I originally had planned for Questions: Answered Thursdays, but now I am nervous as to what could be posed … because I like to avoid … or there’s always the feared possibility of having no questions in which to answer. (Isn’t attention from the ugly boy better than getting no attention at all?) Maybe we should turn this into a group discussion; yes, I like that better. Much safer. Anything that we should ALL discuss? Stories/experienced to share?

If you have a topic for next week, let me know; otherwise, for this week: What do you remember most about your first kiss? Ready … GO.

I have a really good reason as to why I’ve been sucking with the posting as of late. Ready for it? Because of inertia.

I’m going to play the inertia card. Really? Yes. Inertia! Brilliant!

Let me explain. If I remember my high school physics correctly –actually, we also discussed the concept in 8th grade Earth Science (solar system, etc) – Inertia is, “The resistance or disinclination of a body to act or change, maintaining its state of rest or uniform motion – the tendency of a body at rest to remain at rest or of a body in straight line motion to stay in motion in a straight line – unless acted upon by an external force.”

While my body was in an active state, I was productive; I kept moving. Work, sleep, do it all again. Go, Go, GO. While doing the two job thing, I typically napped on my one night off. I would go home, go straight to my bed, and sleep for three hours. I’ve fallen back into that pattern … except every night is my night off. And I am not tired. Just lazy. I do it anyway. My body, in a constant state of rest, is more apt to stay at rest.


I know, right? My excuses now have a scientific explanation. I am just that cool.

But ok, really not cool (ha, in case anyone out there actually believed me for that half second). This weekend was spent doing loserish things. I didn’t see my friends, I didn’t go to the bar. I showered only once and that was because I didn’t want 6-miles worth of sweat to taint my freshly washed sheets. [FRESHLY WASHED. Just like my bathroom floor which smells beautifully of bleach.] I barely left the house all weekend, instead choosing safe, boring activities such as midnight baking with a glass of wine (… those six dozen cookies will be promptly pawned off to unsuspecting friends later this week).

Although I enjoyed the quiet, I also began to fear that my body in rest will stay in rest. Forever. (Yes, dramatic. Have we met?) So I am going to be the external force against my resting inertia. I’ve gone running the past three days and remembered how much I enjoy that adrenaline surge; I even completed my abs/arms workout that I learned when dating sleeping with that cute boxer. I applied for another serving job. I researched Greece. My bed has become less inviting. My energy is returning and with that, my brain should also regain a little spunk and creativity. My blogging inertia will soon remain in a state of motion.

Things that have made me crabby today:

1. I almost wrote irritable instead of “crabby” because a certain ex-boyfriend used to inform me that the word crabby was “so Midwest”. Fuck that. Crabby Crabby Crabby. Stop invading my thoughts.
2. A nooner appointment with the dentist
3. My life does not involve cooler noon-time activities. I miss college.
4. No cavities. How am I supposed to maintain sullen with good news?
5. Rush hour
6. Drivers who do not know the rules of rush hour yet insist on driving in rush hour. Get out of my way.
7. Minivans. And their inability to merge.
8. Finally found a house that I wanted to purchase yet I qualify for significantly less without my added wine bar income. Welcome to job search time. My least favorite activity in all the world.
9. Blister.
10. Migraine.
11. Took migraine medication which annoyed me as each pill costs $15 and MY INSURANCE SHOULD PAY FOR IT BUT DOES NOT
12. The woman wearing baby powder deodorant.

Things that made me a tad less crabby:

1. I didn’t shower this morning. Maybe I smell, don’t know, don’t care, SCREW THE MAN.
2. Friends in town from Chicago and Africa this weekend, can the drinking start now?
3. Lent is almost over. I need to purchase some happiness, dammit, hopefully in the form of new shoes.

Internet, I missed you.

Our vacation condo did not have internet access. Our beautiful 3 bedroom, 4 bath, multi-million-dollar beachfront condo had no Internet. The neighbors did not have any that I could steal either.  How is that possible? Also, how is it possible that a former teacher, my mom’s friend, gave us the use of her beautiful condo and Lexus for over a week? This is the same person who lent me her convertible one summer because she was sick of it crowding her garage, making it difficult for her kids to get their bikes, and I’d be doing her a big favor to take it and could I “try to get it up to 5,000 miles because it needs an oil change?” and if something were to happen to it, “it’s just a car Molly.” Everyone needs such a friend like that; everyone should be such a friend. Internet, if I ever have money, which, you know, is highly doubtful, but IF please remember that I promised all of you that you can stay in any of my vacation homes, free of charge, just because I adore all of you. (See? Do you see how much I missed you?)

Anyway, GORGEOUS location, lots of sun, no Internet. The no Internet thing was actually kind of great in the beginning because I had Mai Tai’s to drink in the sun – much more important than checking email.

But then four days passed and I started to feel a little claustrophobic. Because of ALL THE POTENTIAL THINGS THAT COULD BE GOING ON IN THE WORLD. And yes, I watched CNN and my boyfriend Jon Stewart, especially when on the treadmill (and I like how they are categorized in the same sentence, as if they were both Very Credible News Sources), but they never gave me updates on the important things – like Shanti or Fish or any of my other loves. Disgraceful.

But now, I am back. Back in (cold, blustery) Minnesota. Back online. I couldn’t be happier.

Also, side note, today I turn 25. I hate my birthday. The attention makes me uncomfortable – I prefer to eat Chinese in my sweats to celebrate but I don’t think my friends will let me get away with that. But I do like that a new year is starting. And as 24 sucked balls, I can’t wait to see what 25 is going to bring.

Yesterday, I was asked if I like my life.

Whoa. The blunt question caught me just off-guard enough that I actually thought about my answer –and thought about it for just a little too long.

Not really.

My life has potential. The pieces show promise for the future. Definitely moving in a responsible and productive and successful direction. But on the whole, at this moment, do I like it? Not really. It’s fine. It definitely could be worse. MUCH worse. Seriously, no complaints here. But then, I don’t really have too many pieces that I would brag about either.

Like chicken for dinner. It’s fine, wise decision, very healthy. But that doesn’t cover up that it’s blah and tasteless. Needs a little something … like salt. Or, a side of steak. Besides, chicken for dinner has always been a little too conforming for my taste; I would rather have cereal or an entire bag of baby carrots.

I go through the motions, each day happens, and then I go to sleep with plans to go through the same motions tomorrow. But I don’t really like it. And that needs to change.

PISCES: So often you’re asked to face reality, and you decline the request. This is an excellent way to maintain your happiness and health. Too much reality is a detriment.

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