Apparently, our non-relationship is getting pretty serious because we discussed a few cliché relationship topics, one being our number. After he gave me his actual, and I gave mine as a range of ten – which gave me much more leeway than if I admitted my actual number, for the good or the bad of it. I felt like I needed to justify why mine was lower than his –why I felt the need to go into this, I have no idea –but I explained that I have a tendency for living an entire relationship without it ever happening.

“So how’d we do? Did we work out?”

“Not my point – anyway, a lot of people whom I could have done, I knew it would change the friend dynamic which I wouldn’t want, especially knowing that a relationship wouldn’t work out.”

“So…? Did we work out?”

“Dude, that’s not my point.”

“You’re only cool when you’re drunk apparently. You should just admit that you’re attracted to me — at least just a little and you don’t like it because I’m an asshole.”

“No, that’s probably the one thing you got going for you – I am constantly attracted to the assholes.”

“Good, that’s almost an admission. We’d have fun though, at least admit that, cmon …”

“I’d give you four-to-six months.”

“Really? That’s it? Wow. You underestimate me. Ok …”

“What would you pin it as?”

“I’m not talking about that.”

“I gave you a range.”

“I’ll just say that you fit my criteria.”

“Noodle’s Criteria: 1. mentally unstable 2. somewhat needy. I’m sure many girls fill your criteria.”

“Whom I date isn’t what I’m talking about. But thanks. Maybe someday you’ll want to makeout. But I’m not going to have our first makeout a drunken one …”

“Aww, did you want it to be special?”

“Yes. Magical. You’re retarded. I hate you. I’m never talking to you again. Goodbye.”

“Ok, let me know when you’re over that.”

“But … it’s so nice out, we could make out outside …” and then, “but now I’m starting the never talking to you again thing. Ok, bye.”

The relationship conversation without an actual relationship … good thing I am so obviously done with him. Good job, Mol, way to stick to your decisions.