“I really think that owning pets should be illegal.”

“Like, all pets?  And for everyone?”

“Of course everyone … but not all pets.  Just cats and dogs.  Think about it.  Half of the world is starving.  So much so that they eat dogs and cats for dinner.  They NEED these animals to survive and we have them hanging out in our house.  It’s selfish is what it is.”

“Well, some pets are closer to family members.”

“If I named a cow, I would still eat a cow.  Besides, it’s REAL people who are dying.  PEOPLE.  Who are DYING from starvation.  Who is more important: saving people from suffering from a preventable state or having a cat prance around the house?  Furthermore, we should transport all our dogs and cats to the starving people of the world.  Think of all the lives that could be saved if you donated McFluffster and Bailey.  A goldfish or hamster would probably die before they reached their destination, but we have time to send the meaty animals.”

“I think you’re fucked up.”

“I think you’re a heartless bastard to let children go hungry.”